There is a harsh truth in the world that many of us do not want to acknowledge and that is being dependant on your parents. It is a simple question of fact. No explanation, justification or rationale will ever change the fact of the matter.

The healthy age range to gain independence is between 18 and 23 years.

How can you tell if you are dependant on your parents? (Make applicable adjustments for LGBGT+)

If you are male and calling on your mother for emotional support, you are sexually immature. If you are female and calling on your father then you are sexually immature. If you are in a sexual relationship and calling on your parents in this manner then that sexual relationship is not working for you.

If you are male and calling on your father for practical support then you are socially immature. If you are female and call on your mother for practical support then you are socially immature. If you have a social life and are calling on your parents in this manner then your social life is not working for you.

What is the solution?

Go out into the world and find the sexual and social relationships that make you whole. You will know you have found them when you no longer call on your parents.

How does an independent person treat their parents?

Treat your parents with gratitude, kindness and generosity. After the age of 23, any problem you think you have with them is, in reality, a problem you have with yourself. This is life. It is what it is. You can complain about the lack of fairness and how it should be but that will not change anything. You are simply either dependant or not. Whatever it is to be done to achieve independence is your lot in life. That is the work you have to do. You do not get to live someone else's life. This is yours.

Now go and live it and stop being such a baby.